I made the announcement of my retirement from organized leagues, tournaments and any challenges in the Leagues and Tournaments forum last night. I hope to still pop in every once in a while just to play fun team scrum games at night. The key word is fun.

I also wanted to take this moment to share something very personal that might help explain why I would become a little whiny and edgy on ocassion. I've explained some of the reasons to a couple of players that I've become friends with and felt I could trust. I've also touched on some of the reasons for my moodiness in a thread I posted not that long ago called "the secret behind paisano's recent moodiness". For those that give a flip and even those who couldn't care less, here's the deal.

I can't play structured organized TT games anymore because it's quite frankly impossible for me. As my captain and teammates can attest, it's very difficult for me to make a match on time and even missed one match entirely except for the final 3 minutes. Others will have noticed that I have a very bad habit of leaving games all of a sudden without even a word or even worse, in order not to lose my spot on a server, I will leave my idyle tank in the game which is totally unfair to my teammates as they have to play a man down.

Anyway, I've gotten a bad rep for this disappearing act and justly so, but it's not for the reasons some of you believe. Some like to think I only leave when my team is losing badly which is totally untrue and unfair. I've left just as many games where my team was winning and I was doing very well. These people just happened to witness my hudini act during a loss or two and formed a false assumption. I can understand why but it's not the truth.

Why did Paisano always come and go like a ghost? I'll reveal the truth now just for the record. I have a wonderful wife but she has experienced a horrific accident which totally shattered her foot and despite many operations and therapy it will never be normal again which impacts her mobility, which means I have to do alot more than usual to help her out. Add the fact that we have two very active boys ages six and two and the fact that the little one never sleeps thru the night, then you can imagine my schedule. Because of all these factors, I can almost never play an entire game of scrum (yeah, Date man, that explains why you hardly watch me complete a full game...but as you noticed, I always scored enough to win despite that..lol).

Well, with a third baby on the way any time now, it only means life will become that more hectic and stressful. As some of you have noticed, the stress of my situation only got worse and worse with time as I continued to come and go during games, disrupting any flow we had in our games.
It also made me edgy and short-tempered and I would whine and complain more than usual too. I still feel my complaints were warranted and only meant for the improvement of the game that night to make things more fair, but I could have whined less or said things better.

So, in order to save what remains of my sanity and nerves, I've decided (with much encouragement from an 8 month pregnant wife who detests our silly cartoon tank game) that I should not even try to play in organized games. I cannot possibly keep any commitments to scheduled games so why even bother? It's not fair to my teammates or opponents and not fair to me or my family because it just makes me miserable and upset.

In summation, I want to go back to the way it used to be for me. I loved it when I could just jump on and play a game or two when I had the time and just enjoyed myself. Those that know the real Pai know that I am actually a fun loving nice guy who has a shart wit and can be quite funny during games...win or lose. I did not like what I became. It's ironic, the better I got and the more I won, the less I enjoyed the game because of all the factors I mentioned above.

If I quit playing altogether, then I want to take this moment to say goodbye to everyone and thank you for all the fun we had. I also want to apologize to anyone I've irritated in recent months with my crysano/whinsano escapades. I hope this long winded opus sheds some light on my strange and unusual behavior lately (very unlike me if you knew me).

Remember this, Paisano means Friend in Italian. I've enjoyed playing with my friends.

Ciao a tutti

Paisano®

@paisano

Sounds pretty sensible to me. Good luck to you and your family and with the almost new born :P

Last edited: Saturday, July 02, 2005 at 2:52:10 PM

Being an Italian, I would think you know you can really never leave.

Take it light, see you in the games.

:) Napai

I am sorry to hear about this all Paisano, I can only imagine how much stress you must be in.

I've had to look over a 4 year old for a day...fun and cute for the first few hours, then the clinging just gets tiresome. With that experience I can really look at you and others and say "Wow..they are amazing."

I'm not goign to say I'm sorry to hear about everything you have mentioned, because obviously it is a given

I remember when I was new, you were always very courteous to me and I always remember you being a good person in TT.

Like n.apalm said - Take it light...relax....good luck with everything

Btw, I saw someone playing with the name Paisano with no copyright sign...if there is no copyright sign, its an imposter, correct?

Last edited: Saturday, July 02, 2005 at 5:07:42 PM

Imposters.

Pai,

You're a wise man. I can relate to everything you posted, except for the injury. I have a 7 year old, a wife (who hates this cartoon tank game), and a demanding job. There's no way I feel able to commit to a league, although it sounds like a real blast.

I wish you and your family well, and hope to run into you from time to time. I play when I can, for fun, then have to put it away until next time... Sounds like what you describe.

See you out there!

LGM

^not understanding his post. On a completely different note, try playing some oldes for the kids. Beatles are great to fall asleep to. The "I am sam" album is my personal favorite! Xo_z ^z _z

Come on Pai...get your priorities straight. Kick 'em to the curb.

Last edited: Sunday, July 03, 2005 at 5:43:10 AM

Leagues games are harrowing experiences. When you win you're a nervous wreck, when you lose you're depressed for a week.
Enjoy your free time playing freely! Each new game is a clean slate.
Cheers,
HB

Well, you're finally doing the right thing. You've been playing all of this time despite your "wife who detests our silly cartoon tank game"??!!! Wow, don't I appreciate my wonderful wife of 22 years.

(yeah, Date man, that explains why you hardly watch me complete a full game... But as you noticed, I always scored enough to win despite that..lol)

Actually, (reality break here...) I NEVER noticed you scoring enough to win despite that.. Seriously, just that statement shows that you do definitely have a problem - I believe the official name is: "TallyHoish Enorminous Egostratum" and is common among the veteran players here. I've heard that you're a good player but have only seen you make a couple of goals and I've played with you lots.

God bless!

@ Date Man; Dude, lighten up. I have played against Paisano and have found him to be a remarkable and formidable player. It wasn't until I had played the game for about 4 months and came up with (what I believed to be a very witty and original name) that I learned what an impact he has had on some of the players of this great game. I do believe he once called himself "Flatulance", and whenever I used my screen name, the players would all have great things to say to, and about me (or Paisano as it were). Why do you want to kick a man when he is down?? What you should do, is get down on your knees and bow down to royalty. If you have played this game lately, I'm sure you are aware that players like Paisano are getting extinct.

This recurring drama is bringing tears to my eyes.

Edit: And it ain't the weed, folks. It's empathy. Not ! It really is the weed man ! Hold on need another hit ! :P

Last edited: Monday, July 04, 2005 at 2:52:27 PM

Dont worry Pai, You'll be back XD

I'd like to join the "My wife detests this silly cartoon tank game" Club.

I can't relate to this, but I get a general idea. *sighhh* Another great veteran departs... Or might... I WILL miss you, Pai... I can understand, though. I guess you'll have to have a real life for a change...

@ Pai - good times! See you in the little games.
My wife likes this fabulous online cartoon tank game but she thinks I play too much. Hehe, she don't know the half of it, that's just when I'm at home.

@ DateMan - Have you been into Jangy's stash, cause you must be high. You haven't a clue what you are talking about. All you do is lag.
I have logged hundreds of hours with paisano and he is a noble and highly skilled player. This thing he talks about just started happening, and now it makes sense.

Dateman you are very dishonorable.

MAX

All rightieeeee. Which of you moderating clowns is playinz wid me lines?

X gets a spanking :)